BLOG OF MAYANK JAIN
The Wind-Up Bird Chronicle | Haiku
To all the day dreamers
Just because it is happening in your dreams
Doesn’t mean it is unreal
#Book Reviews in Haiku
On the origin of language
In a discussion with a friend, I’d call it a discussion even though she was quiet and I was quiet and we were sitting without a care in the world, we figured out why language was invented - To Lie.
This is it. This is the end of the post, the end of everything, you can go home now.
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Or, you can choose to stay back and get to know what preceded that.
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So I see you decided to stay back, I’m glad. What happened was this: We were just sitting and chilling, looking at each other for quite some time, smiling, looking into each other’s eyes and just having a general feeling of contentment, happiness and fun. We didn’t speak a single word and yet our eyes said things to each other and it felt like our true feelings were communicated. After some time she asks: “Why do you think the language was made for?” to which I reply, “To lie”.
Isn’t that true? It is so hard to hide your true emotions and feelings as compared to lying in words. All the lie detectors in the world check your emotions not what you say - even they know where the actual truth comes from. All the people we lie to, they always sense something is wrong no matter how well we choose our words. But feelings, they are the true tell of what is in your mind.
Maybe, the inventors of language were actually really bad people who wanted to lie and do things which were until then not heard of and they’d wanted to keep that a secret. And that is why they invented language as a means to communicate instead of gestures, feelings and touch. So that they could lie.
I believe a true conversation happens without words. Isn’t that what they say about a good friend, he’s someone who can share a silence with and still feel like you’ve had the best conversation in the world.
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What I see with my left eye
When I was 14 years old, a freak accident gave me the ability, if it is the right word to use, to see weird shapes with my left eye.
Here’s what happened: While playing badminton, a friend hit me with the racket on my eye. Don’t ask how it is even possible, but it just goes to show how bad my doubles partner was at the game. Anyways, the doctor said it is fine and nothing serious. But, of course there was something very serious.
A few days later, I couldn’t see above a certain horizontal level with my left eye. So, assuming you were my height then, I would have to raise my neck a little bit to look at your face. This time the doctor did say it was something serious. Apparently, my retina had detached from its position and was hanging loose.
The operation involved cutting open my eye(yes!), inserting some ice instrument (yes!) which then burns the retina so that it melts and sticks to its original place (yes!). The doc said that this eye burn is common to people in colder areas. I don’t know how much of it is correct because the doctor could have tried to explain me things in a simple way or I could have misunderstood him or my memory isn’t as sharp as it was then. The doctors among you can vet how correct this is. To close the eye back, they had to stitch it up (yes!). You could actually see 4 black stitches in my eye. They gradually melted away and my eye became almost perfect.
Almost.
What’s remaining is I see your face in a little contorted shape with my left eye. And I see weird shapes which look like these:
I don’t really know what to make of it. This shape is funny, because if I try too hard to notice it, it shifts its place. But when I really relax, it lets me have a look. I think the shape has changed over the years. It feels as if they are black stars floating in a sky of yellow liquid. Just observing these shapes is a good way to spend some time alone.
When my mind is at peace, they present themselves to me. When I am not looking, they appear. When I look too hard, they go away. But, if at times, I tell myself that I am not looking, and still let the eye move, they reveal themselves to me. A momentary loss of mind control pushes them away and they become haywire and scatter away. I guess they just need a clear mind as a breeding ground. It is as if they are waiting for mind to be at rest. Otherwise they run amok at free will which is neither mine nor does it seems theirs.
I don’t know if to conclude something from it but it reminds me of something I’ve read in way too many books: It is when you are at peace, your mind is calm that all the beauty of life presents itself to you.
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Best books I read this year
Lately, I managed, or better put, forced myself to find more time for reading. And not just some superficial online reading jumping from one blog post to another but some actual books. Here are a few I read this year which influenced me a lot:
1. Kafka on The Shore - Haruki Murakami
If you’ve been one of those people who have been around me in the last couple of months, you would have heard me rambling a lot about Murakami. He is quite simply one of the most magical writers I have come across. His brand of magical realism came to me at a time when I was just getting into parallel worlds as a concept. Hence, its effect was more profound. Even if you are not into that kind of stuff, his pure genius with play of words and the way he weaves his stories is incredible. In the past 2 months, I’ve read 4 of his books and all have left a deep impact on me. And Kafka on the shore is the one I found the best. You can also read my review of the book here.
It is more like a journey, much less a book. In Richard Bach’s own words:
”I do not enjoy writing at all. If I can turn my back on an idea, out there in the dark, if I can avoid opening the door to it, I won’t even reach for a pencil. But once in a while there’s a great dynamite-burst of flying glass and brick and splinters through the front wall and somebody stalks over the rubble, seizes me by the throat and gently says, ‘I will not let you go until you set me, in words, on paper.’ That’s how I met Illusions.”
Just finished reading two days back, the simple, honest writing is disarming. Camus’ afterword, where in just two pages he explains his intention with the book is equally brilliant. The protagonist isn’t saddened by the death of his mother and it comes as a surprise to the society at large. More so because he is absolutely honest and frank about his feelings. Thus in a way, the book is more about being honest to yourself or rather your own feelings even at the expense of pissing off a lot of other people in the process.
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Simplifying decision making
Would it matter one year from now?
In times when you find yourself worried sick about something, ask yourself this question. Whatever you decide to do in a certain situation, would the choice matter so much one year from that moment?
Proving someone wrong at the cost of lost love, or all those extra hours in office at the cost of your health and relationships, or that party you regret not being a part of, or what you should wear on a particular evening- is it all really going to matter a year hence? Probably not.
You could come back and tell me that this theory trivialises everything. Maybe it does. But, what is wrong with that? From my experience, I’ve found this exercise very liberating.
Asking myself this question has helped me in simplifying my life and I hope it helps you too.
Further reading: Don’t Sweat The Small Stuff - Richard Carlson
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Norwegian Wood | Haiku
Dead friend’s girlfriend,
And bookshop owners,
And old musicians - which true love?
#Book Reviews in Haiku
Conspiracies of Life #37
You and I are projections of one single source. The universe is just a game someone is enjoying at our expense. We are not really alive because our lives exist only in the minds of some- or that- One.
All the code of how the game works is embedded into our brains. The brain is a powerful, all knowing bag of secrets. But, it can go rogue sometimes and spill out the secrets of the game, which the One doesn’t want. Thus it is kept shackled, under restraint. It is not allowed to explore a higher consciousness.
You know how people say that we use only about 5% of our minds and even the great thinkers that have come before have been known to use much more but just about 10% of their brain. Why so? What stops them? Answer: Our nerves - that connect everything and ‘control’ everything in our body. These are The One’s soldiers. The One is also known by philosophers as The Single Truth or by religion as God. These soldiers guard our brain, keep it in shackles. They don’t want us to realise our true potential or the truth behind all this because if we do, it will be the end of everything, of life as we know it.
People who do drugs, they talk about getting a ‘hit’. Here’s my definition of it: A hit is every time a nerve soldier dies. Think of it this way, when you take drugs, the ones which expand your mind and force you to think, you get ‘hits’. Every one of those hits, kills a nerve. The number of nerve soldiers constantly recedes as they keep getting hit. They are probably shouting ‘man down’ and are trying to scatter and run towards bomb shelters. So, when you are high, the guard is down and you experience different things and see a lot of stuff. But slowly the soldiers come back from their shelters with higher ammunition to protect ‘the truth’ from us. And we come back to our normal state. But, since the number of soldiers are lesser than it was before, some part of the brain is unprotected and we feel much more informed than before.
Sometimes people say, that they have a huge capacity for alcohol or drugs or whatever. It takes them longer and much higher quantities to get high. I think what they mean is that those remaining soldiers standing with higher firepower are better prepared this time. So the next time you take a hit, it takes longer for them to die.
The mystics and sadhus have been known to do it via meditation and sanyas. This higher state of consciousness is what we all seek. It comes in different forms. For some, it comes after a long run, or a good piece of music or a beautiful picture.
Opening up of our mind is what we constantly seek.
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Kafka on the Shore | Haiku
Cats,
Raining Fishes,
Johnny Walker - All true lives
#Book Reviews in Haiku
Kasol
Travel is fatal to prejudice, bigotry, and narrow-mindedness.
The 4-day trip to Kasol with a friend was meant as a stress-buster, to find new perspectives and to just BE. It turned out to be much more amazing than I had imagined. Listening to crazy stories of other travellers first hand had a huge impact. These stories are what made the trip memorable. So, instead of talking about the touristy stuff - what to do, what to see, where to eat, I would like to share with you, some of these very real and personal stories.
Ivan, pronounced Eevan was a storyteller. 40, divorced, father of a kid he had with a girl he married because he got her pregnant, Ivan is a traveller. He studies chess books and recreates moves between Kasparov & Kramnik but says he doesn’t understand why they made this move or that. He sailed from the Africas to the Carribbean with a friend and 2 other people he had just met. He comes from a country where he says “ Israelis have had the worst”, with his family moving from Bosnia after the 2nd world war because the forces wanted people to build houses and infrastructure. He got me into reading Osho books and says they are cinema for the mind.
Kent, a young South African, IT guy, travelling alone and with a crop of hair which would put David Luiz to shame. I asked him how he feels about travelling alone and if he ever gets bored. He said something which stayed with me till long after - “You have to like your own company. I like mine and so I enjoy travelling on my own”.
Zooey, British, still has her accent but doesn’t know it, left home when 18, fell in love with an Israeli in India. Travelled with him for two months, broke up, went to Cambodia and Vietnam to travel where she bumped into some people she met in Kasol. Now lives in Tel-Aviv a floor below a drug dealer and studies psychology. Talks fast, doesn’t care if someone’s listening or not.
One of our many Israeli neighbors was Shachar. During her time with the army, herresponsibility was to ring the alarm whenever Palestine shoots a missile towards Israel. Just 21, she dreams of having her own farm full of dogs and training them to be with and aid blind people.
Another one of them was a dude whose name I forget. “I’ve had too many loves (sic), they all break my heart”, he tells us. Guitar strumming, didgiredoo playing, drum beating, ‘McShit’ tee-shirt wearing, with the most brilliant tattoo on his arm, he sits outside his room playing with the little kids. He was a very happy man.
The owner of the guesthouse we stayed at was a sweet lady with long dark hair and in the words of another person the ‘smile of a queen’. She sits with us listening to our stories and sharing her own while her two beautiful little daughters who played with us while we and the neighbors did you-know-what in Kasol.
Perhaps the most interesting character we met was a Baba, who called himself a Naga Sadhu. He wore aviators, grooved on ‘Badtameez Dil' listening to it on his high end phone, and wore a tiger skin print cloth around his waist. Devotee of Lord Shiva, he told us of the number of years since he left home and now finds his residence in a cave high up in the mountains around the place.
Jaipur
A couple of weeks back, I took a weekend trip to the pink city, Jaipur with a couple of my friends. It turned out to be one of the most relaxing and fulfilling trips I’ve had. And this was a sentiment shared by my friends as well. For a man who has lived in Mumbai, Bangalore and Delhi for the last 3 years, Jaipur’s slow pace was a breath of fresh air. The place seems relaxed, running at its own pace and has a nonchalant charm about it.
This is a short account of what I experienced. All the information is based on what the locals there told me and intentionally not verified from any other source. Excuse the quality of pictures, the three of us are noob photographers.
1. Jal Mahal, The Lake Palace:
This is a beautiful, glowing palace in the middle of a lake. What amazes me is that the place was so deserted. You know how many people were there except the three of us — 5. And three of them were street food and ice cream vendors. If this was somewhere in Mumbai, it would be perennially crowded. Marine drive in South Bombay, for example, has a pretty similar feel minus the quiet.
2. The climb up the hill
Rajasthan is known for its forts. And jaipur being the capital at the time, has some of the most amazing ones. The route, like all hills, is pretty awesome and makes for a pretty comfortable ride. We stopped at a place on the way where we clicked this. The big glowing thing is the Lake Palace. And the best part, there was absolutely no one else there which is crazy and immensely relaxing. This lack of crowd and being able to just be was a constant theme on the trip. The peace and the quiet was almost overwhelming.
3. Nahargarh fort:
Goofy friends: Mohit and Nishit
On the way up the forts, we had an option of going to Amer or Nahargarh. We chose Nahargarh and man was it worth it. I was so surprised by the fact that the place was still open at night at 10. Again, there were not too many people, just one small group of 4. And guess what, the open air cafe served beer! For a token entry fees of 50 bucks, we got some refreshments as well. The whole city is obviously visible from the fort and looks beautiful.
4. Choolgiri, The Jain temple
View from the top
Most of the cities in Rajasthan are surrounded by mountains. So, the roads are often made by cutting out a part of the mountains as you can see in this. This place is a pretty steep climb with some sharp turns. And it is usually hot so even though you can walk, I’d recommend taking a car up to the temple. The temple itself is pretty much what you’d expect from a Jain temple if you’ve ever been to one.
Tunnels shaped in royal arches
New ride
5. Prem Pan Bhandar
Mouthful of happiness
The happiest guy you would see is right in that picture, behind the two of us in that photo frame. Who wouldn’t eat at that shop after that picture. This place had the most delicious paans ever and we made it a point to go there both the nights.
6. Lassiwala
Out of stock at 3 in the afternoon
I wish I had a close up picture of this place. Lassiwala is supposed to be the best lassi place in Jaipur. When we arrived there at 3 in the afternoon, his stock had finished up, all the instruments packed and the shop owner was still sitting there doing absolutely nothing, smiling at us as if saying, “Yes, I am that good”. Like any good thing, this shop also has its share of copycats who have opened up shops next to it where we eventually had mediocre lassis. They still have to slog through the day while the guy next to them finishes up a day’s worth of business in the first few hours.
8. City Palace
The City Palace was an extensive tour of almost 3 hours. The yellowish palace is the actual current residence of the king who happens to be 15 years old and studies at Mayo. The flag hoisted is the official flag of the kingdom. Whenever the king is in the palace, an additional blue flag goes up. The rest of the place is open to public viewing. We got to see old pictures, robes, courtyards, weapons and lot of interesting stuff. The kings of Jaipur are called ‘Sawai’ - translated literally it means one and a half. They were known to be extremely strong and could take on more than one man in a duel, hence the name.
Other places we visited:
Food was a major part of the trip. Here are some other places we went to.
Rawat Kachoriwala - Started the trip with the must haves onion kachoris at probably the most popular mithai shop in Jaipur
Tapri: A very chilled out teafe serving good tea.
100% Rock: I wasn’t expecting much from Jaipur’s pubs which was a wise decision. This place played the same songs you’d hear over and over again in most places. And I think they were trying to copy Hard Rock Cafe but did so with much less taste - they had crappy pictures of guitars instead of real guitars hanging on the walls.
Laxmi Mishthan Bhandar: Even though I am a Marwari, I am not a big fan of Dal Baati, unlike my friends. And according to them, the daal baatis they had here were some of the best.
Another kachori shop: They used to serve the kachoris in Raj Mandir, Jaipur’s oldest movie theater.